My 2016 Unemployment Diaries Recap – Day 17 to Day 18. More to follow

Please note, this is a reposting of some previous entries made in 2016 when my position was eliminated and I found myself unexpectedly unemployed. This is being reposted here simply for the purpose of preservation as I am not maintaining the old site much. In any case, enjoy if you feel like reading it:

Day 17 and 18 of unemployment – Bathrooms and Suburban Gangs

Sorry about the lack of updates, but it’s been a busy couple of days folks. It all started with the crappy weather. Because it was crappy, I could not do the sawing I needed to finish up some kitchen trim pieces, so I decided to take on the simple task of re-caulking the bathtub/shower area in our downstairs bathroom. It had some mildew stains and did not look very nice.

Yeah, so I would like to share the following message with my fellow human beings…

If you don’t know how to properly caulk a tub, just don’t. Hire someone, please? Honestly, the amount of effort I had to put in to taking this old caulk out was ridiculous. I don’t know what they used, but it seemed to be part caulk, part Adamantium. I’m not even sure how many razor blades I broke, both straight edge and utility knife types. After about 2.5 hours, I finally got the major part of the silicone removed.

During this time, I started to notice how bad the grout was. Dangit! I should have just focused on the super-caulk, but once seen, something cannot be unseen. Suffice it to say that this generated multiple conversations about replacing the tile vs regrouting, changing colors, 6 or 12 tiles, etc. This led in to the inevitable, “I really don’t like the counter top or cabinet” conversation. Here I am a day later, with a new countertop/sink, lighting fixture, a new dremel tool and a plan to regrout.

I also removed the shower doors and frame (so 1990’s, sheesh). Now I have been working on removing the white grout with the dremel. Let me tell you, this is dusty, dirty work. Jen got me some dust masks, but I had already started working before she got home from the store. Let me tell you, I’m going to have white-grout boogers for a month. I also looked like a coke head with all the powder around my nose and have a feeling if I had gone somewhere and been pulled over, some rubber gloves and close inspections would have followed. Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do?

While I was working, the mandrel for the grout removal wheel broke off. There were diamond coated wheel parts flying around everywhere. Smacked me square in the arm. I’ve taken a break for the night and will regroup after church in the morning. Enough is enough.

While we were out looking at sink tops and other bathroom stuff, I noticed something odd happening in our little part of suburbia. The children seem to no longer walk anywhere. They only move by hoverboard. You see them in small wheeled mobs and I even saw one kid playing basketball while riding one. I have my suspicions that hover-gangs are forming in the hood. I won’t be surprised to see tweens sporting 3-patch colors on their “My Little Pony” backpacks saying things like, “Flow-Rida’ in the hizzouse ya’ll, better step off or you gonna get whacked wit my Scooby-Doo lunchbox. BTW, you wanna buy some Girl Scout cookies? I got ‘yer fix, yo!”

Ah, the youth of America. It’s a disturbing trend. I’ll admit, I have not been a fan of those since almost getting run down by a hipster riding one while pulling his back behind him in the Houston airport. I wanted to smack the venti salted-caramel-Frappuccino-with-an-extra-shot-and-soy right out of this hand and feed him that board instead. He was lucky violence is frowned upon in airports. It was a while ago now and I know the airlines have banned them. I’m not bitter at all though. Really.

Another thing I learned while shopping is to stay in the car when your wife and mom go in to Hobby Lobby. No good can come of following them in. I swear at one point I was standing there talking to them, looked down and when I looked up, they were gone in a puff of glitter and yarn fragments. Took me like 20 minutes to regroup with them. I found a seat and got comfy. I had their purses in the cart, so I knew they wouldn’t get far. Next time, I stay in the car and listen to the radio.

On the job front, I am still hoping to hear back soon from the two places I have been interviewing with. I did apply to about 5 or 6 new opportunities last week and today I got a message on LinkedIn from a person I had dealt with while at my last job. He saw that I was between jobs and wants to see about having a talk on Monday. I’m excited because I’ve always been a big fan of their product and them as a whole, so I want to hear what he has to say. I really hope we get to chat.

So, that’s what I’ve been up to. I’ll keep you all posted as things progress.

My 2016 Unemployment Diaries Recap – Day 15 to Day 16. More to follow

Please note, this is a reposting of some previous entries made in 2016 when my position was eliminated and I found myself unexpectedly unemployed. This is being reposted here simply for the purpose of preservation as I am not maintaining the old site much. In any case, enjoy if you feel like reading it:

Day 15 of unemployment – Blissful Undress

Today was great. Probably the greatest thing about today was wearing pajamas almost all day long. I don’t recall having done that before unless I was very sick. Even better, I actually left the house that way, several times.

Initially I only went to the convenience store to get a fountain drink. It was fine at 10am, people are still OK with pajamas at that time. Maybe not as much for 40-something year-old adults in PJs, but hey, sue me. I got my soda and the world was right.

Later on, I decided to venture to the Holy Grail of PJ-as-an-outfit stores. Yes folks, before I knew it, I was standing proudly in the local Walmart wearing my grey checkered PJ pants, a t-shirt, ball cap and shoes with no socks. I was in my element folks, I resisted the urge to grab one the electric carts and scoot my way around the cookie isle, but only just. I’m not sure I will have the fortitude to deny myself that in the future.

I can tell you that I strolled up to that Redbox machine like a boss! Once my movie was returned, I went and grabbed some crack-in-a-can (a.k.a. Razzleberry Peace Tea) while giving head nods to the other underdressed patrons. It was good, I was with my peeps.

Upon returning home I did some job searching and got to episode 7 of “Making a Murderer”.  I only stopped watching because I had one more trip to make and had to be there by 4pm.

For this trip, I did make a minor adjustment to my attire. I added socks. I have say, they joy of PJs can be somewhat impacted by the squish of sweaty toes in shoes. Nobody can say I don’t learn from my mistakes. I think I may have to burn those shoes.

My final trip in PJs today ended up being to the post office to pick up a letter for my mom. After a quick scan of the walls to make sure my picture wasn’t posted, I picked up the letter and headed back out to the parking lot. I have to tell you, there is something wonderful about standing in a parking lot at 3:30 in the afternoon in pajama pants. As an added bonus, this was also the parking lot of a gym. I felt like I was giving the whole protein-shake with extra whey crowd the finger, silently, without even having to raise my arm. It was blissful.

Other than that, I got invited back for a 5th interview with a certain company tomorrow morning. That’s 2 phone and 3 in-person interviews. I’m getting to know the reception staff pretty well. Wish me luck please! I’ll report back tomorrow.

Day 16 of unemployment – Duuuuude!

So today I find myself wearing a suit again at 9am. This is really starting to mess with me. First off, it was 9am and I was dressed. Second, did I mention that I was dressed in a SUIT? This is no way to spend my unemployment time.

If you have been following my little adventure here, then you know the suit was the result of interview #5 with a particular company. It went well and I felt that meeting the lawn maintenance team was a nice touch in the interview process. OK, I didn’t really meet them, but I think they may be the only ones I haven’t met. I’m still excited about this position, so I keep moving ahead. FWIW, I think the interview went well.

After the interview, I contacted my Belgian buddy who is visiting the US right now. We had made plans to go shooting this afternoon, because, well… Murica!. As it turned out, he was right across the street enjoying breakfast (no, he wasn’t eating waffles) with an old boss of mine. We chatted for a while about old times, new times and Donald Trump. It was great catching up.

From there we went to the shooting range. Well, we tried to, but it appears that GPS instructions don’t work for foreigners. I mean the place was right off the road in plain sight (down a road, behind a building, camouflaged and marked with signs that said “Toxic Waste! Do Not Enter!”* and with a digital sign at the street that changed between the businesses located there). I suppose in Belgium, where all of the businesses are housed in large buildings that look like 6th century castles**, it might have been hard to see.

We finally found the place. Upon exiting my truck, I could immediately smell gun smoke and testosterone*. I was in my element. I know not everyone likes guns, but I happen to really enjoy target shooting. It is relaxing for me and forces me to concentrate on what I am doing, control my breathing and focus on the target. For me it’s a lot like eating Ice Cream, only I don’t fatter. After shooting the variety pack of guns I brought along, we shot the coup de gras of bangsticks, a fully automatic AK47. It was phenomenal. I had a gungasm right there*.

I do want to say that I have a new appreciation for fully auto guns. I also realize that I SUCK at shooting them. There is a good chance that they will be able to patch the holes in the ceiling*. Just sayin. Two minutes after letting out the full-auto assault, my body was still shaking (not from fear or excitement, but because I’m fat). The man-silhouette target would have escaped with nothing more than a soiled pair of undies and possibly some temporary ear ringing*. I was that good a shot. Next on my bucket list is tossing a hand grenade. Always wanted to do that.

After that, we had lunch and chatted some more. I came home to attend a parent meeting at the local high school, then called it a day. I am hopeful that I will hear from one or more of the companies I have been interviewing with soon. Wish me luck!

* I might have exaggerated a tiny bit here

** So, this is purely speculation, but it is true that Belgium has almost 3000 castles, making it one of the highest density of castles per square km in the world. (totally NOT BS cuz the internet said so)

My 2016 Unemployment Diaries Recap – Day 12 to Day 14. More to follow

Please note, this is a reposting of some previous entries made in 2016 when my position was eliminated and I found myself unexpectedly unemployed. This is being reposted here simply for the purpose of preservation as I am not maintaining the old site much. In any case, enjoy if you feel like reading it:

Day 12 of unemployment – Arizona Football and Wal-Mart Bathrooms

Day 12 of unemployment – This is a small update, and for this, I’m going to have to take it back to the previous night. You see, there was this football game. This game you see, pitted my Arizona Cardinals against the Green Bay Packers and was for moving ahead in the post-season. This game started at 8:30pm Florida time, it ended late. I mean really late. On top of that, it was a great game. One of those “did you see the game?” games. This was full of crazy plays, including an almost impossible “hail mary” and a coin flip where the coin did not actually flip. Couple this is a night full of storms, and bammo, not much sleep.

On a plus note, we were able to spend some quality time with the chicken-dog when the thunder happened. Oh, yeah!

That made my 0800 call time at church where I was working as the Producer, a bit of a challenge. I don’t think I really woke up until halfway through the 2nd service. No one seemed to notice so all was well. I was happy to realize that at least I was wearing pants.

Other than that, I spent most of the day working a firearm trade and eating various things. Overall, a day well spent.

Oh, a message to my fellow male people. When you are using a public toilet, please lift the lid before you pee in (or on) the toilet. This was even low for Wal-Mart standards. Not cool. Seat, UP, Leave it if you must, I won’t complain.




My 2016 Unemployment Diaries Recap – Day 9 to Day 11. More to follow

Please note, this is a reposting of some previous entries made in 2016 when my position was eliminated and I found myself unexpectedly unemployed. This is being reposted here simply for the purpose of preservation as I am not maintaining the old site much. In any case, enjoy if you feel like reading it:

Day 9 of unemployment – (Recap) – Crack-aland

Day 9 of unemployment – (Recap) – This is really getting silly now. I was in a suit again, this time at 6:20 in the morning. I was getting ready to head for an interview again, only my truck would not start. Great. I took Jen’s car instead. Why was I leaving at 6:20? Well, Google was kind enough to estimate my travel time between 40 minutes and 1 hour and 40 minutes to the interview in Tampa. That’s a bit of a difference.

Well, I got there in about an hour, leaving me a while to sit around, so I decided to find a nice Starbucks or something to hang out at. Well, turns out this is not a “Starbucky” neighborhood. It was however more of a street crack peddling, daytime hooker sort of neighborhood. Even the church I found had an 8 foot wrought iron fence surrounding it. It was 7am and the locals I saw were wandering around like the zombies from Walking Dead, only hung over. I ended up retreating to the IKEA about 10 minutes away, where I parked in the middle of the lot with plenty of open space around me. First rule of crack-zombie-meth-head-survival is to allow plenty of room to escape before being car jacked.

After hanging out there for a little while, I went to the office where I was interviewing. That went pretty well and I got to meet some pretty cool folks during the interview. From there, I made the trek back to my home area where I met up with some of my friends from church for lunch. We ended up going to Buffalo Wild Wings. We must have been a bit of a sight walking in there. We had a mix of hipsters, farm boys and even a guy in skinny jeans, with me in a suit.

After lunch I went home to return Jen’s car, got some tools, jump started the truck and headed to Costco to replace my batteries. I guess I didn’t realized that my batteries had been going bad for a while. Now that I have the new batteries in, it cranks over like a caffeinated squirrel now. Awesome!

I spent the rest of the night at church doing rehearsals for the weekend service, getting home at around 9pm. 6am to 9pm made for a really long day. Hence the lack of updates yesterday.

On a plus note, I’m excited about the interview and opportunity. Wish me luck!

My 2016 Unemployment Diaries Recap – Day 6 to Day 8. More to follow

Please note, this is a reposting of some previous entries made in 2016 when my position was eliminated and I found myself unexpectedly unemployed. This is being reposted here simply for the purpose of preservation as I am not maintaining the old site much. In any case, enjoy if you feel like reading it:

January 11 at 9:32am – Day 6 of unemployment

Today will be a busy one. My 8:30 webex interview started, but he had to go to a meeting, so we are going to regroup again at 11:00. I am meeting another recruiter at 3:00 for coffee and to go over my resume and discuss what she has available. I also need to pick up my stuff from the old office in there some time.

On a plus note, I just dropped my youngest off at the park from where she walks to school. I was wearing grey pinstriped suit pants, slip on shoes, a white undershirt and a black Rockstar energy drink hoodie. I think I just got some street cred from some of the moms there. I was totally rocking the “whatever was laying around” attire. If I had enough hair to put in a messy ponytail, I would already be in the club. There is always tomorrow.

Sadly though, nap time is ruined! Being unemployed suddenly feels like a lot of work. Sheesh.

January 12 – Day 7 of unemployment

Day 7 of unemployment – Once again I was denied sleeping in. I had scheduled a doctors appointment at 8:20am. What was I thinking scheduling at that time? I thought I would have more rest than this without a job.

I have however become one of the pack. Not the pack of neighbors, but the pack of animals in the house. It all started with us spending time together this morning all barking at the rather started and confused looking mailman. Then we spent some time chasing each other around the house barking. The cat was not amused. Both of the dogs are just resting peacefully on my feet and sharing space. I am the Alpha in this pack now, and I’m so happy I feel like dragging my butt across the carpet in joy!

I did have a 3rd interview at 12:30 that I think went really well. I am assuming no more than 17 interviews left to go, and I’ll know more about getting the job.

I have been pretty nervous about this and not sleeping well because of it. I found myself feeling anxious about the interview, so I started watching Making a Murderer, which has been recommended by a few friends. I’m on episode 2 now and I’m hooked.

Speaking of hooked, still no fishing has transpired and my loving wife told me last night, that it’s just too cold for her to want to fish. Who is this woman, and what have they done with my wife? I will get some fishing in if it kills me.

I will update as it happens.

Day 8 of unemployment – The Lawn Crews Cometh!

Day 8 of unemployment – Well, today it happened as I had been told it would. Laurel Ludwig, you were right, the lawn crews came today. The came like horticultural ninja’s on zero-turn mowers. It was like a botanical ballet with weed-eaters, edgers and power blowers performing a dance to rival Broadway shows. It was fascinating to watch, and ended as quickly as it started.
Once ended, I peered out over my lawn and realized that those little buggers had now made my lawn look like a war-torn battlefield in comparison. Dang it, now something had to be done about that.
I proceeded to break out the lawn implements and attacked my Jumanji-like landscape. While taking on the front yard, I found that someone let what appears to be a medium sized pony use my yard as a restroom. It was HUGE! I am not a fan of poop. I have a very week stomach and tend to do the whole “ech, ech, ack” thing as I try not to recycle my previous meal. I’m a real tough guy with the dry heaves and a plastic bag trying to sack up this unsightly fecal phenomenon.
After that, I hit the back yard. Here, I was surprised to see that a 100% increase in dog butts appears to have created a 500% increase in poop. I did learn something new today… If you raise the wheels high enough, the mower will just clear the poop, leaving it exposed for your kids to pick up when they return home from school. They are less thrilled about this revelation than I am, but it worked great for me :D.
Tomorrow I am supposed to have an interview at 8:30am. Wish me luck!

My 2016 Unemployment Diaries Recap – Day 1 to Day 5. More to follow

Please note, this is a reposting of some previous entries made in 2016 when my position was eliminated and I found myself unexpectedly unemployed. This is being reposted here simply for the purpose of preservation as I am not maintaining the old site much. In any case, enjoy if you feel like reading it:


January 6 at 9:48am · For the first time in a long time, i am now unemployed

January 7 at 10:11am · So, 24 hours later I still feel a huge amount of relief…

Oh, and catching up on Mr. Robot. I’m going to catch up on Mr. Robot darnit!

And maybe do some fishing.

God is good and has a plan so I’m not scared!


January 8 at 9:49am · Day 3 of unemployment

There is a significant chance that will have to actually get out of my PJs today. It’s unfortunate, but I have 2 interviews scheduled. One has a very relaxed dress code, but that might be pushing it a bit.

I will now go peer out of the blinds, make a condescending sneer and retreat to my quiet domicile for a while longer.

Stay tuned for more updates later.

January 9 at 12:07pm · Day 4 of unemployment

Fishing evaded me again due to forgetting to set my alarm to go off on Saturday. I will avenge that error soon!

Until a bit later.

January 10 at 1:34pm – Day 5 of unemployment

After the shower, I actually put on clothes so I could go to church. Our church is pretty casual, but 3-day worn Arizona Cardinals pajama pants may have been pushing a bit, even there.

We are about to relinquish the pursuit to be the last family in the country to see the new Star Wars movie. We had some left over Fandango cards from Christmas that we were able to use. I was beginning to think we wouldn’t get to see it until it was released on DVD…

…while crouched in the neighbors bushes looking at their TV through their window. Not saying money is tight, but, well, ya know without a job and all, some adjustments have to made…

I have changed my focus on the war with the mouse living in the grill from simple eradication, to a potential source of meat. Things are about to get primal in the Kron lanai. Speaking of which, if you know anyone interested in purchasing mouse pelts to use for warmth this winter, let me know. I will accept pre-orders and shipping is possible.

I’ll keep you all informed of my progress. Until then, have a great day!